Tuesday, December 8, 2009

e fuck-up phone



and yes! i'm so gonna to bitch about my handphone as my first post after e exams! simply wat e fuck~! its such a disappointing product from sony ericsson... i've been using e brother series, T600i, & i simply love every part of it, high system stability, drop from level 3 yet it worked perfectly fine, etc, & esp. all e beautiful pics that were up on this blog, used to be e babies of my previous phone... & so, thinking that C902 is e big brother wif 5.0 Megapix, it will be way superior.. i was so damn wrong... all i can conclude... its a huanted phone!

this phone sux becos:
  1. e keypad is simply glued-on
  2. e outer skin is not casted-on, but simply pasted over using plastic skin which peels off on e 1st day of purchase
  3. e camera button contradicts wif e other buttons in its programming script (i gotta hold on to e camera button so that e rest can work)
  4. after e 4th visit for servicing at sony ericsson, e service gal claims that e phone is in perfect condition
now comes e interesting part...
  1. it switches off when i try to ans calls...
  2. pt. 1 does not happen when my mum calls
  3. it switches off when i wanna switch off e alarm
  4. 1/2 way thru my examination, it turns on on its own
  5. e alarm rings even when e battery is removed (zhang mei)
  6. it simply went on strike thru out e examination period
everything that can go wrong with a handphone, it all happened on mine... every part fails, less e superior Cybershot camera function... talking bout e nice pics... lemme share wif u all, a very interesting story: 'Pets of the Phua Family'



MAY
dunno y my dear eldest sis started her new hobby, called 'Fishkeeping'. basically, building & rearing aquarium fishes for viewing purposes. somehow her hobby, became everybody else, think i can term myself '养鱼达人' real soon.

for e start, we had 5 dunno-wat real small fishes & shrimps swimming in e tank. so small that jayren can't even find e shrimps, dad can't even sees them, mum claims that they r not even big enuff for her to 'bao bah zhang' (anw... they were claimed by my sis to be prawns).. after a month time... e fishes starts to die... its pandemic, all gone within 2 days... & so, everyone in e family begins to draw assumption for their sudden death...

according to e fish doctor, sis' bf, e fishes were not fed on a regular basis, so irregulatory in life has caused their death.. n e decomposed body of one contaminated e water, & poisoned e rest. since all of us r not home in e day, nor even in e nite, my poor retired dad shall adopt 5 more kids when my sis bought new fishes to replace e deads.

JULY
somehow, e fishes starts to die AGAIN! doctor came & diagnosed that e water quality is poor, hence e fishes got ill, suffering from poluted water...
  1. tar from my dad's smoking
  2. bacteria produced from e little snails
alrite, there's no way u can get dad to quit smoking, he will die e day he quits... so now we have to constantly spot & pick out these snails that r no more than 2mm in size from e plants... trust me, its a real tacky task upon me cos i got e best eyesight... everytime i tried to pluck out any that i saw, it was claimed that i accidentally killed e plants too, causing e oxygen composition in e water to drop, killing e fishes indirectly!

AUGUST
to think that everything that we need to do is done, e fishes dies AGAIN! so this time, e finger goes back to my dad... due to his aging eyesight, he's over-feeding them by scooping too much food! since sch has yet to start, i shall feed them... something new for me man, u can't feed fishes by simply throwing their food into e tank! guppies r top-eaters, e dunno-wat r mid-water eaters & e prawns r e bottom eaters.. so if i juz dump e food, not all gets to eat... u gotta use e tweezer, hold on to e food, n bring it to their mouths!

in this feeding process, i killed e fishes AGAIN! cos when i moved e tweezer through e water, i created great turbulance that e fishes can't take it... lost of appetite & died again... ROAR!!!



i really loves these shrimps! they never ever die! good boys! its rather fun to c how much they have grown by measuring their shedded shells, which r picked out from e bottom.

SEPT/OCT
mum, being a perfect old-fashionist, strongly feels that e deaths of e pets is a bad thing for e family, & she will apply her unorthodox 风水 practise to save e family! she knows nothing much bout geomancy, wherever got problem in e house, she will place e well-blessed, octagonal-shaped S$1 coin at that corner. same thing. she puts them in e tank! OMFG, e fish dies, e finger flies, ya, this time, mummy got e bullet...

NOV
everyday, sis will call home at regular hours to check on her fish... me & 二姐 will frequently check on e numbers. we tot that we had finally found e perfect fish rearing strategy, but... e fishes proved us wrong... somehow, e shrimps r real tough, like Nike series, All-Condition-Gear, no matter wat happens, they r still breathing.

after great depth of investigation, it was concluded that due to out irregular home-hours, e tank lights r not on, & e plants r not photosynthsizing enough & e fishes suffocated to death! so now dad got another new task! bet it muz be a real torture to be a pet in e Phua's family... y dun they juz jump out of e water to commit suicide & save us all e trouble? its quite tiring to figure out their cause of death..



DEC
happy me who finished his paper has finally returned home! its 6pm & time to on e lights for e fish tank! stunned when it din light up, called for sis, reported that e lights aren't working, & i tot i did a great deed. sis rushed home, me got screwed, cos i denied her tank 3 hrs of lights, that e switch now works on timer & will automatically switch on at 7pm & off at 12mn, me pressing that on/off button has disturbed her configuration! how e fuck i know sia! ROAR ROAR!



this stupid timer is well hidden in a corner...



next day... this little piece of paper is pasted over e switch button... ROAR ROAR ROAR!!! ask me anything bout fishkeeping now, i can write u a book.



how sad, took a pic of our abandoned tower on e 7th dec... & i'm still defending it... sob sob... e feeling sux to e core to be e last to finish e exam... i can't celebrate cos e rest would have well over spent on celebrations in e earlier dates.



back to my life! 'The Worlds Within' latest show by my fav. Song Hye Kyo in 2009 since 'Fullhouse' in 2005! DRAMA-MODE, disturb = death.

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